Sunday, July 12, 2009

-Never buy a car without cup holders

-Starting a sentence with "OK, but you can't tell anyone" always ends up with someone finding out

-Don't give cab drivers your credit card at the beginning of the ride, they're only going to crash trying to fill out the papers while they're driving

-Karma is a bitch so don't be a jerk

-Don't EVER sit directly on a public toilet seat, it's never clean and rarely dry

-Find a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/partner that's your best friend and life will always be awesome

-If you have a retainer and you don't wear it, your teeth WILL move

-Don't eat pizza when it's too takes patience, but if you jump the gun and burn the roof of your mouth, the whole pizza is going to suck

-Take lots of pictures, but don't forget to enjoy the moment!

-Inserting a piece of chocolate into the centre of a roasted marshmallow is 10x better than an actual smore

-If he's not calling you, he's just not that into you!

-Don't finger or holler obscenities at other drivers, because they just might be conducting your next job interview

-There's no secret to losing weight; eat less and work out more

-Family and friends are more important than anything (even your Blackberry and your Bentley)

-And one more thing.....take off that SILLY ASS HAT!

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